the ebb and flow of doing stuff
There is a rhythm to things in the world and you sometimes have to just go with the flow or with what feels right. I say this because I haven't posted anything on either of my blogs for a while now. Not that anyone is waiting to read my meandering thoughts. It's also not like I haven't had a lack of things I could write about but I think with work and the stresses of life I just haven't had the desire to write anything.
I kinda felt a bit burnt out these last few weeks and on top of that I have had some essays to write which drains the desire to write about anything. I feel like I have dropped out of life for a bit and just switched on autopilot. Run through the motions until I have some energy to put into other tasks. I spent a few weeks watching the 2011 Spartacus show that aired on Starz. It was my second time watching it and this time round I really picked up some interesting messages. I wanted to write about that but every evening id finish a double bill, look at the bear shortcut and decide, "I can't do that right now".
The other day I saw footage of a reunion show for the band Children of Bodom which reminded me how much a fuckin love their first few albums. Children of Bodom are a symphonic/melodic death metal band from Finland. They are the equivalent of pop music for me within the metal genre and remind me of a simpler time in my life. I stopped listening to them after their 4th album but they continued for many more years until Alexi Laiho the main driving force of the band died. So to see them back on stage with a guy called Sammy Elbanna filling the shoes of Alexi and killing it was really great. I wanted to write about that but once again I just didn't have the drive in me to put words to...um screen.
As for my other blog that deals with more serious subject matter.I have recently joined a Tenants Union and have found it to be a fantastic way to practice some more direct action. This would have made for a great post over on my other blog as it is the exact thing I would like to talk about over there. Once again the desire to write about it just wasn't there.
I know that I have ebbs and flows in my hobbies and interests so I knew to a certain extent that I would have to ride this out for a bit. Sometimes you have to step back and just go with the flow and trust that it is the right thing to do. It's not like I'm not writing at all, as I mentioned earlier I have some hench essays that I need to do and some massive final assignments coming up so I don't foresee this space being used much in the next few months. It does however weigh on my mind from time to time but I do wonder if that is part of the game of the internet. Jared Henderson released a video today on nebula,so I cant link to it, but he spoke about how the internet gamifies you without you knowing. Algorithms and "scores" keep us creating content so that we can keep feeding the machine. He said it better but you get the idea.
So yea, this is something I think about from time to time. Am I subconsciously in this game and that effects how I write? Probably. At the end of the day it doesn't matter because this isn't my job but the ways the internet works still has an effect on us and in some way dictates how we engage with things. I think I will stop here because things get a bit esoteric in my head at this point and maybe I will save that for a later post.